One of the clearest memories I have of bringing Lily home from the hospital was on the very first night. It was late and Cindy was sleeping. Lily fell asleep, and I placed her gently in the crib. Her eyes opened the moment I set her down. Her brow furrowed. She cried. She screamed.
This was the moment that I was sure I was in over my head. It was a very shocking moment. There was a pit in the stomach from very real fear. Lily has been demanding since, but I've learned that we can deal with it.
The only real shock since bringing Nate home is that he's so much different.
My concern for the first couple months was that he would grow up incapable of empathy - that he was autistic. I had this fear, in part, because he didn't require constant interaction with mom & dad. He has gone into the crib, willingly, from the beginning. He'll sit in the swing, contentedly watching the room. He never gives that furrowed brow look the moment you set him down, and even his cry is delayed till after a period of quiet whimpering.
Now I see that he doesn't need the interaction, but still loves it. He's showing a personality and loves to see funny faces - or just faces (even if the ceiling fan still can be fun to look at too).
Cindy says that Lily's behavior was a product of how we treated her as an infant. We let her sleep in our bed when she cried, for example. I don't buy that. I think we've seen the personality signs from day one, and they will play out into how they act as adults. Nate could just as easily have slept in our bed every night, but he never demanded it.
Personality-wise, they were born what they are. Very different and each, like every child, very special.
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